i c s and i c me.

i c s and i c me.

i don’t know what it means, but the sound of it verbalized flooded my head when i woke up. odd dreams of Christmas killing people. i don’t know what’s going on in my subconscious, but i’m not really liking it.

an extra rehearsal this afternoon.. have to be at Stones Corner by 12ish, should be finished by 5pm. for some reason i’m feeling less than happy, not really depressed, but not here. a definite sense of nothingness that leads me to reflect on what is, what could be, but not what was.

one thing i noticed on Friday.. i arrived at rehearsal feeling narky, aggravated and hating the world.. and after about 30 min of hanging around the cast, i felt on top of the world.. it wasn’t that nothing could defeat me, it was that regardless of what tried to bring me down, i was still here. still going forward, as if there was some force propelling me along, making sure i get somewhere. still don’t know where that somewhere is, but i’m not sure i need to know just yet.

Virgo, Tuesday, December 4:
If you hold out your hand, someone is likely to give you far more than you want. You can’t afford to get bogged down or overloaded. Stay light on your feet and quick with your words. Your purpose will be clear soon enough.

interesting.. potential for both sides of the coin.. huzzah, can’t wait for today to start.