its a cool, clear day. spring sprung while i was away.. today, there’s not much to do, but i’m glad of that. tuesday’s are usually chaos here, with princess being home from college, i’m usually dealing with the insanity that he spreads, or which naturally follows him where ever he goes.. but today, i slept in, went out to do a few things, purchase birthday presents, pay bills, have lunch, and return home to do nothing in particular. not sure if there’s nothing to do, or if i’m just unaware of what has to be done. i’m lost, i’ve lost contact with whats going on in this city, this house, the stage production, everywhere i look, everything that pops up in front of me, my only reaction is to ask “huh?”
there’s still a few people i haven’t gotten in touch with since i’ve been home. it’ll happen. i’m still finding my feet, recovering from the flu, recovering from having to drive home (damn Ansett) and trying to find where i was with everything before i left, and where those things have progressed to now, as well as processing the last couple of weeks events..
yesterday.. back to the stage production. futile argument over a mute point that i couldn’t be bothered following, much less taking part in.. best described as “sexual politics and honesty to a character, vs. political correctness and the generalized reading of a text, in order to protect the audience and our reputations..” personally, i think if it has to be said, it should be said, the audience are responsible for their own reactions, not me. you don’t see newspapers avoiding sensitive issues, to keep the public ’emotionally stable’. spent the day switching between feeling happy to be back, and frustrated at being left out of what’s being going on.. nothing major, just little things, in-jokes of things that happened, new people to meet, conflicts that arose, and worked out, it’s just that i’ve lost touch, away too long, missed too much.
d: hapy birthday tiff.
tiff: aww, thanks d..
d: 25 now, you’re getting old.
me: don’t say that, i turned 26 two weeks ago!
d: oh that’s right. happy birthday you old bag!
me: thanks.. i appreciate it..
d: did you miss me?
me: oh of course i did.. how could i not?
the irony is, he’s older than i am..
the cat has barely left my side since i got home.. she follows me around, sits in the chair beside me in the lounge room, falls asleep, then wakes up, realises i’ve wandered off to another room, and follows me there, announces her arrival, as if to say “there you are!” then settles down again..
words, aliens, Taco Bell and fire alarm stories whizz past me, am i dreaming or is it real? voices in the other room, apparently going over a character for a film, conceived while i was away, and has to be finished in two months (i think) for exhibition.
need water, neurofen, sudafed, chocolate cake, cat cuddles, and hugs from two of the people i missed the most. the first five are easy to find, one is impossible, the other, unlikely. damn it all to hell.